Reasons I Would Make a Terrible Wife: Vol. III*

One of the many perks of teaching English in Ehime is that Ehime is famous for mikan, little mandarin oranges, and when mikan are in season, my students give me grocery bags full of them literally every day. Mmmm.... Sometimes I even eat them for dinner if I don't feel like fixing something a little more substantial. Perhaps this is not the most nutritionally sound diet, but I tell myself that at least I don't have to worry about getting scurvy.

Last week was a particularly fruitful one. At one point, I think I had at least two dozen mikan in bags on top of my refrigerator, so before I left last Thursday on a little five-day trip to Kyoto, I went on a mikan eating frenzy -- must have eaten four or five mikan per day -- and finally, on Thursday night, I departed for Kyoto, having successfully depleted my rather large hoard of fruit.

Or so I thought....

When I came back to my apartment this morning, I noticed an odd smell emanating from behind the refrigerator. I wandered around my apartment for a few minutes unpacking and thinking all the while, It smells like oranges in here. Oranges...and....and...easter egg dye?? Impossible, no one dyes easter eggs here...But it definitely smells like oranges. Oranges...and....and dirty socks???

I finally decided that the strange odor required proper investigation, and peered behind the refrigerator to find that a paper sack of oranges had fallen into the crack between the fridge and the wall. I attempted to pull the sack out, but it disintegrated in my hands. The mikan fell to the ground with a nasty squelch, and an enormous cloud of green dusty mold billowed out across my kitchen. When the green dust finally settled, I ran to the bathroom, looked in the mirror and found that I looked like the Wicked Witch of West's slightly paler sister.** I washed off the green ick and then proceeded to de-mold the rest of my kitchen.

By then, the smell was much worse, and I could just imagine all of the mold particles still floating around in the air and turning my lungs green. If the mold could annihilate those mikan in a matter of days, how long would it take for the mold to eat me alive too???

Anyway, my kitchen is much cleaner now and I am still alive, so all appears to be right in the world. I guess I should find a different place to store the mikan from now on, though...



* Vol. I and II can be found in previous posts for your further (懐かしい) reading enjoyment.

**Minus the pointy hat and warts.